Today we are completing our four-week series called, Healing Fractured Relationships.

Today, I’ll focus on two cousins who attack our relationships: Mistrust and suspicion.

I especially like to read Psalm 146:3-9 in the Message translation,

Don’t put your life in the hands of experts who know nothing of life, of salvation life. Mere humans don’t have what it takes; when they die, their projects die with them. Instead, get help from the God of Jacob, put your hope in GOD and know real blessing! GOD made sky and soil, sea and all the fish in it. He always does what he says— he defends the wronged, he feeds the hungry. GOD frees prisoners— he gives sight to the blind, he lifts up the fallen. GOD loves good people, protects strangers,

takes the side of orphans and widows, but makes short work of the wicked.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 says, 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

7 tips to building trusting relationships:

1. Love is patient.

What does it mean to say ‘Love is patient?’

It suggests that love doesn’t give up on people or situations when they

become challenging or testing.

2. Be kind to all people.

3. Use your words to represent Jesus well.

4. Control your temper.

5. Forgive.

6. Rejoice with others.

7. Trust God in all situations.

https://www.bible.com/events/49215060

Church of the Nazarene – Harrisonburg

Healing Fractured Relationships, Part 3: Rejection

No one can ever reject you as powerfully as God accepts you.

Welcome to our journey into a series we are calling “Healing Fractured Relationships”. Together we are seeking the Lord’s wisdom and guidance for our relationships: all relationships. Why? Because all relationships matter.

Whoever those people are that matter most to you, that’s who we are talking about today and in the weeks to come. And most specifically, we are talking about relationships in our lives that are hurting.

Each week, as we talk about relationships, we will talk about specific tools that can help us. God’s Word has truth for us, tools for us, regarding our relationships, especially those that are hurting.

Every single person knows something of today’s topic: rejection.

If you were to call to mind a time when you were rejected, there is probably still an ache associated with that.

But take heart, early on in your Bibles, not far from the very beginning, is one of the most profound cases of rejection in history.

It’s the story of a man named Joseph.

Genesis 37:17-28

“They have moved on from here,” the man answered. “I heard them say, ‘Let’s go to Dothan.’ ” So Joseph went after his brothers and found them near Dothan. But they saw him in the distance, and before he reached them, they plotted to kill him. “Here comes that dreamer!” they said to each other. “Come now, let’s kill him and throw him into one of these cisterns and say that a ferocious animal devoured him. Then we’ll see what comes of his dreams.” When Reuben heard this, he tried to rescue him from their hands. “Let’s not take his life,” he said. “Don’t shed any blood. Throw him into this cistern here in the wilderness, but don’t lay a hand on him.” Reuben said this to rescue him from them and take him back to his father. So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe—the ornate robe he was wearing— and they took him and threw him into the cistern. The cistern was empty; there was no water in it. As they sat down to eat their meal, they looked up and saw a caravan of Ishmaelites coming from Gilead. Their camels were loaded with spices, balm and myrrh, and they were on their way to take them down to Egypt. Judah said to his brothers, “What will we gain if we kill our brother and cover up his blood? Come, let’s sell him to the Ishmaelites and not lay our hands on him; after all, he is our brother, our own flesh and blood.” His brothers agreed. So when the Midianite merchants came by, his brothers pulled Joseph up out of the cistern and sold him for twenty shekels of silver to the Ishmaelites, who took him to Egypt.

Joseph’s brothers sell him into slavery and fabricate a lie to tell their father Joseph was killed by a wild animal.

Chapter 37 concludes with one final farewell note.

“Meanwhile, the Midianites sold Joseph in Egypt to Potiphar, one of Pharaoh’s officials, the captain of the guard.”

Rejected. Sent away unwanted. For Joseph’s brothers, this rejection seemed final.

But rejection was not final for Joseph, because man’s rejection does not equal God’s rejection.

It’s important to acknowledge what we are experiencing physically, mentally and emotionally when we feel rejection.

Data suggests that our brains interpret rejection like we would actual physical pain. Our bodies are hardwired to respond to rejection.

But with the pain of rejection, researchers have found that the pain is ‘re-lived’ over and over. The body and brain can respond multiple times over and over in a similar way as that emotional pain is experienced again and again. Rejection, quite literally, hurts.

It can cause our minds to fill with negative emotions, like guilt or shame.

We have thoughts like:

‘I’m not worthy’

‘I’m broken or flawed. No one could love me.’

‘I always mess up. I’m never enough.’

We have to acknowledge these negative thoughts and emotions, but if we get stuck there then we are often blinded to God’s truth.

Somewhere in the life of Joseph, he made a difficult but life-changing decision. We don’t know exactly when, but it’s clear somewhere along the way he decided to trust God in the midst of his hurt.

The hurt and pain of a rejection so unthinkable was real for him, but in spite of that, he chose to trust God’s promises.

Genesis 41:39-40

Then Pharaoh said to Joseph, “Since God has made all this known to you, there is no one so discerning and wise as you. You shall be in charge of my palace, and all my people are to submit to your orders. Only with respect to the throne will I be greater than you.”

Genesis 50:15-21

When Joseph’s brothers saw that their father was dead, they said, “What if Joseph holds a grudge against us and pays us back for all the wrongs we did to him?” So they sent word to Joseph, saying, “Your father left these instructions before he died: ‘This is what you are to say to Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly.’ Now please forgive the sins of the servants of the God of your father.” When their message came to him, Joseph wept. His brothers then came and threw themselves down before him. “We are your slaves,” they said. But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.” And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.

Joseph’s life could have been so much different, right?

Rejection could have ruled him, instead, redemption did.

Jesus Himself understood what it was to be rejected.

Isaiah 53:1-3

Who has believed our message and to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed? He grew up before him like a tender shoot, and like a root out of dry ground. He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.

God has a way of turning rejection into redemption.Jesus, the rejected one, is now in the glory of Heaven, with you on His mind.

One of the reasons the story of Joseph is one of the most significant in the Old Testament: in this life, the rejectors don’t get the last word.

“Every ounce of rejection you have faced was God grabbing your shoulders, positioning you into the proper direction, and moving you forward.”

Amy Klutinoty

The bottom line:

No one on can ever reject you as powerfully as God accepts you.

Verses for further study/reflection:

1 Peter 2:4

Psalm 34:17-20

John 15:18

Psalm 27:10

Psalm 94:14

Isaiah 53:3

Updates on the new Waynesboro campus

God is inviting us to step out in faith to plant a Spanish-speaking campus in the Waynesboro community. Join us on the journey!

Check out the link below for more information and for frequent updates throughout the journey.

Waynesboro

Giving at COTN

If you ever have questions or need help with online giving, please let us know: finance@cotnaz.org Thank you for your partnership in building the Kingdom of Christ as you impact others!

Giving

https://www.bible.com/events/49214245

Church of the Nazarene – East Rock

Healing Fractured Relationships, Part 3: Rejection

Past rejection doesn’t have the power to define our future- God does.

==========

Welcome to our journey into a series we are calling “Healing Fractured Relationships”. Together we are seeking the Lord’s wisdom and guidance for our relationships: all relationships. Why? Because all relationships matter.

Whoever those people are that matter most to you, that’s who we are talking about today and in the weeks to come. And most specifically, we are talking about relationships in our lives that are hurting.

Each week, as we talk about relationships, we will talk about specific tools that can help us. God’s Word has truth for us, tools for us, regarding our relationships, especially those that are hurting.

The chances are every single person knows something of today’s topic: REJECTION

If I asked you to call to mind a time when you were rejected…there is probably still an ache associated with that.

But take heart, early on in your Bibles, not far from the very beginning, is one of the most profound cases of rejection in history.

It’s the story of a man named Joseph.

Genesis 37:19-28

“Here comes that dreamer!” they said to each other. “Come now, let’s kill him and throw him into one of these cisterns and say that a ferocious animal devoured him. Then we’ll see what comes of his dreams.” When Reuben heard this, he tried to rescue him from their hands. “Let’s not take his life,” he said. “Don’t shed any blood. Throw him into this cistern here in the wilderness, but don’t lay a hand on him.” Reuben said this to rescue him from them and take him back to his father. So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe—the ornate robe he was wearing— and they took him and threw him into the cistern. The cistern was empty; there was no water in it. As they sat down to eat their meal, they looked up and saw a caravan of Ishmaelites coming from Gilead. Their camels were loaded with spices, balm and myrrh, and they were on their way to take them down to Egypt. Judah said to his brothers, “What will we gain if we kill our brother and cover up his blood? Come, let’s sell him to the Ishmaelites and not lay our hands on him; after all, he is our brother, our own flesh and blood.” His brothers agreed. So when the Midianite merchants came by, his brothers pulled Joseph up out of the cistern and sold him for twenty shekels of silver to the Ishmaelites, who took him to Egypt.

Joseph was one of 12 sons born to Jacob in the Old Testament.

This family is descendant from Abraham, and through them Jesus would ultimately come.

Joseph was #11 of 12, and he was his father’s favorite.

One day his father had sent Joseph to check on his brothers in the fields, and vs 19-20 records their true feelings when they see him coming through the field.

Josephs brothers sell him into slavery and fabricate a lie to tell their father Joseph was killed by a wild animal.

Chapter 37 concludes the rejections scene with one final farewell note.

Verse 36 reads: Meanwhile, the Midianites sold Joseph in Egypt to Potiphar, one of Pharaoh’s officials, the captain of the guard.

Rejected. Sent away unwanted. For Joseph’s brothers, rejection seemed final.

But rejection was not final for Joseph, because man’s rejection, does not equal God’s rejection.

Rejection in your past only has the power you give it over your future.

Rejection strikes at the very core of our created being. And it hurts.

We were created for connection, for relationship, to live with a sense of belonging and rejection cuts deeply into those most basic human longings.

Data that suggests that our brains interpret rejection like we would actual physical pain. Our bodies are hardwired to respond to rejection.

It can cause our minds to fill with negative emotions, like guilt or shame.

It causes an increase in aggression or anger.

From there, it can often spill over into lashing out, seeking revenge.

We don’t choose rejection, Joseph certainly didn’t, but we do have a choice in what we do with those feelings, we have a choice in how we respond.

In fact, what we learn is that God will turn the rejection in our lives into redemption, if we will trust him. We see that all over Joseph’s story.

Genesis 39:1-5

Now Joseph had been taken down to Egypt. Potiphar, an Egyptian who was one of Pharaoh’s officials, the captain of the guard, bought him from the Ishmaelites who had taken him there. The Lord was with Joseph so that he prospered, and he lived in the house of his Egyptian master. When his master saw that the Lord was with him and that the Lord gave him success in everything he did, Joseph found favor in his eyes and became his attendant. Potiphar put him in charge of his household, and he entrusted to his care everything he owned. From the time he put him in charge of his household and of all that he owned, the Lord blessed the household of the Egyptian because of Joseph. The blessing of the Lord was on everything Potiphar had, both in the house and in the field.

The Lord was with Joseph. The one who was utterly, bitterly, completely rejected by his brothers- the Lord is with him.

Friends, if you don’t hear anything else today, I want you to stop right here and here this truth: You may be rejected by people here on this broken earth, but your Father in Heaven says “never will I leave you nor forsake you.”

Joseph seems to have come to a place of acceptance. Not accepting of the evil and abusive behavior- that was never ok. But joseph seems to have come to the place of accepting the reality that rejection will come in relationship. It will hurt. It will be confusing, heartbreaking.

But he also knows- man’s rejection doesn’t have the power to define our future. Joseph never equated how his brothers treated him with how God would.

Genesis 39:19-23

When his master heard the story his wife told him, saying, “This is how your slave treated me,” he burned with anger. Joseph’s master took him and put him in prison, the place where the king’s prisoners were confined. But while Joseph was there in the prison, the Lord was with him; he showed him kindness and granted him favor in the eyes of the prison warden. So the warden put Joseph in charge of all those held in the prison, and he was made responsible for all that was done there. The warden paid no attention to anything under Joseph’s care, because the Lord was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did.

In learning to trust God through rejection, Joseph even found favor while he was in prison. Make no mistake about it- he was in jail. Let’s not lose sight of the difficulty of this rejection journey.

And friends, in our rejection stories and circumstances- Just because it’s rough, even though its hard and it hurts- the Lord is with you. None of those things are a sign of God’s absence.

Mans rejection doesn’t separate us from God.

Through a series of events Joseph is called before the King of Egypt to interpret a dream. The king is so impressed by the favor that God has given Joseph that he puts Joseph in charge of the whole land of Egypt.

He has only to answer to the King himself.

From the pit, to the prison, to the palace- God was with Joseph.

Do you know that there are some who allow the rejection of their past to rule their lives in the present?

– Some allow the FEAR of rejection to prevent them from ever truly living.

– Some continue to give past rejection the power over their present, and they completely miss out on what God has in store for them.

What about you? How are you responding to rejection?

Rejection can be the end, but it doesn’t have to be.

Joseph didn’t allow rejection to define his future- and you don’t have to either.

Past rejection does not have the power define your future-Only God does.

Will you trust Him today with your rejection?

Updates on the new Waynesboro campus

God is inviting us to step out in faith to plant a Spanish-speaking campus in the Waynesboro community. Join us on the journey!

Check out the link below for more information and for frequent updates throughout the journey.

Waynesboro

Giving at COTN

If you ever have questions or need help with online giving, please let us know: finance@cotnaz.org Thank you for your partnership in building the Kingdom of Christ as you impact others!

Giving