Church of the Nazarene – East Rock
Family Values Part 4
Grace
Today we conclude our teaching series “Family Values” where we are taking a deep dive into strengthening our family relationships.
Family is so important. Though often challenging, family can be some of our deepest and closest relationships- and those matter!
We believe your family matters, and perhaps most importantly, your family matters to God.
Family Values is about walking out faithfulness to God within our families. Over the next few weeks we will consider what it takes to build strong family relationships.
Throughout this series, we are clinging to two truths that we believe can change everything for our family relationships.
There is hope and there is help.
Today as we conclude with Part 4 of our teaching series Family Values, we are looking at the value of grace in our family relationships
Colossians 3:12-14
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
No one is proposing that extending grace to one another is easy or simple and that’s not what this passage says either.
Grace means that we are to bear with one other – extending patience, withholding anger, not insisting on our own way. Extending grace requires something of us and sometimes, it requires A LOT of us.
When a family holds grace as a family value, words that might describe that family could be: peaceful, loving, patient, understanding, growing, nurturing, authentic, safe
But a family that withholds grace from each other, you might describe as: Tense, anxious, fearful, hesitant, bitter, and certainly un-healthy
How will you define your family?
By peace, understanding, and compassion
Or by bitterness and tension?
Will you be one that holds grace as a value in your family?
Colossians 3:1-4
Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
Paul is reminding his readers that we have a new life to live in Christ. We have new values and a new focus. These values apply to our lives, our friendships and certainly our families.
Colossians 3:12-14
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
It’s interesting, all these terms are relational in nature, meaning that our faith and trust in Christ as our savior, must show up in how we relate to one another.
To bear with each other is to make allowance for imperfections in others. In other words, you could say “Put up with each other”
To bear with is to withhold retaliation. To endure patiently with anther.
I think we would say- be gracious to one another.
Paul separates this act of being gracious and forgiveness
Forgiveness is largely reactive. It’s a response to an offense, intentional or not.
Grace is proactive- it’s an ongoing forbearance or allowance of daily human shortcomings.
Grace is relational flexibility that is required of us daily in family.
Grace is the proactive choice to love our family despite their flaws, just like we have been loved by our heavenly father.
G- God’s gift to you
R- Resist emotional responses
A- Adjust your thinking
C- Communicate with kindness
E- Express gratitude
If you have been a part of family for more than a minute, you can guess, this won’t always be easy.
Family is messy, but it’s worth it.
Will you be the one to lead the change with grace?
Will you proactively love others as you have been loved?
That’s grace. That’s family values. And you can be the one to bring it to your family.
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